I had my first shot of Lupron Depot on Thursday, February 18th, at noon.  High noon.  Because I’m afraid of needles (and because I’m overdramatic), I treated the appointment like I was being marched down the green mile to the electric chair.  Honestly, if it had been anyone else, I would’ve laughed at them for being so ridiculous.  I mean, seriously?  I’d survived surgery.  A shot in the butt would be nothing.

I would’ve laughed until I saw the size of the needle.

Guys, it was EVERY BIT of two inches long; even my husband, who is quick to (gently) pull me back to reality when I overexaggerate, admitted that it was one of the longest needles he’d ever seen.  Ginger, my nurse, made the mistake of leaving the box open when she brought the shot into the room.  “Is that entire needle going in me??!!”  Ginger was fantastic, though; she was the perfect combination of supportive and dismissive. “Yep, but it’s no big deal…you’ll barely even feel it; I promise!”

She asked me if I had any questions or concerns about the drug, and I was pretty frank about how nervous I was and how many terrible accounts I’d read online.  She echoed Joey’s comments about folks with positive experiences not generally taking to the internet about them, and she gave me the rundown of what to expect (the most common side effects, i.e., hot flashes and moodiness) and encouraged me to email them or call them if I thought I was experiencing anything out of the ordinary.  She also told me that the menopause-type symptoms probably wouldn’t start for a couple of weeks, but that I may have increased endo symptoms during that time, because your estrogen levels surge before they go away.  Thankfully, she’d allayed all of my fears, but (much to my chagrin), that meant it was time for the jab.

She had me lay down on the table since I told her I was scared of needles (and the fact that I looked like I was about to be given a lethal injection).  “We’ll go into your right side this time…we’ve got to alternate, so next month will be the left.”  Joey came back with me and held my hand, and I braced myself for the world’s largest shot in the ass.

And then it was done.  Just like that.  I can honestly say that I barely felt it at all.  Ginger became my new best friend and the best nurse in the entire world.  After a high-five and a hug, she sent me on my way, told me she was in on Thursdays and to plan my next appointment accordingly so I’d get to see her again.  She also reminded me to make sure I was diligent in taking the add-back medication and not to worry, that everything would be fine and it was going to be worth it to kick this endometriosis.

I had a sore butt cheek for a few days, and believe me, I milked that for all it was worth.  Joey already waits on me hand and foot, but I shuffled around and looked sad and pointed at my cheek whenever I asked for something.  I think it stopped being cute the second day, but he humored me until I really couldn’t justify it anymore because I felt fine.

So then began the “two week wait.”  And not the “fun” two week wait (the one where you wait to test to see if you’re pregnant). Instead, it was the countdown to becoming an overheated ball of emotions that falls down and forgets things.

I felt like a time bomb.