The Blur That Was 2009

This year:

  1. I started graduate school and completed five classes, getting straight A’s in each.
  2. Joey and I went to the beach for a short weekend getaway.
  3. We spent every moment possible hanging out with James before he left for Iraq for the year.
  4. I made a lifelong friend in Shannon and we got to be a part of the Garzoni family.
  5. We camped in July and October, the latter in tents and with sleet.
  6. I sprained my ankle.
  7. We took James to Indy to report for duty and, for the first time, I had to say goodbye to a friend as he went off to war.
  8. I learned to knit cables.
  9. I finally got control over my depression and anxiety and found out that I’m stronger than I think I am.
  10. I made an almost-100% handmade Christmas.

I also started a food blog, started writing as a featured publisher for FoodBuzz, and I started writing for as Charlotte’s Frugal Living Examiner (yes, I’ve been super-slack this month).  And, one of the most important things that happened this year was that I became a vegetarian after we lost Lady in February.

Time always goes so much faster than you want it to.  I’ve noticed this already…last month, Joey and I celebrated our seventh wedding anniversary.  My ten-year high school reunion (which I couldn’t attend) was this past weekend.  Ten years.  I don’t feel that much older.  I don’t feel like my family is that much older.  It all went so fast.

However, this year, I think I’m ready for 2010.  While I am proud of what I was able to do in 2009, I also left a lot undone:

  1. I was not successful in my diet/exercise endeavors and, in fact, gained ten pounds this year.
  2. I continue to procrastinate at school, which makes me feel like I’m squandering a huge opportunity I’m being given.
  3. I let my frugality go for the sake of convenience…takeout, the grocery store near the house, etc.
  4. I did not declutter my house.

So, there are things that I want to tackle in 2010…a list will come later, but I know that I’m ready to let 2009 be the past and to jump headfirst into 2010.

On Motivation, Stress, blahblahblah…

Yeah, I’m pretty pissed at myself right now…I totally punked out on the gym tonight and had no good excuse.  I made one up…since Joey has to drive to Wake Forest tomorrow and we need to go to bed early, I definitely needed an extra forty-five minutes to sit on my butt in the recliner playing on Facebook.  Blah…why can’t I get myself in gear?

I really envy these girls whose fitness blogs I read; they seem to be completely and totally in love with exercise.  I never read one of these where they’re like, “I hate freaking working out, but I had to because I don’t want to be a fat pig.”  Granted, I probably wouldn’t read for long if they had that attitude, but it would just help to know that I can still do this weight loss thing even though I really don’t have this great affection for exercise.

I’ve tried in the morning; we have to get up at quarter ’till five to make it to the gym.  With the pace at which our lives move, that’s really just not a possibility.  I’ve tried lunch; it’s all good until you’re sitting at your cube and realize that you smell like a wildebeast and your face is beet-red…top that off with the embarrassment of having EVERYONE who walks by your desk ask you if you’re okay because your face is beet-red.

So, that leaves after work.  No problem, eh?  I was totally on board with hitting up the gym…I rode home from work excited because I was going to have time to read In Defense of Food, maybe even finish it…thirty minutes to just zone out on the bike, burn some calories, and enjoy some time to myself.  By the time I got home, I walked in the door, sat down for a minute, and the mental battle began.  It only took five minutes.  I was in my pajamas and piled up in the chair, watching M*A*S*H and beginning what would be an evening of self-loathing.

Here’s what I want to be eating:

stir fry in action

veggie stir-fry

veg and rice

veggies with brown rice


giant salads


beautiful bowls of healthy oats.

Instead, I’m munching on chips (natural chips, of course, so they must be healthy, right??), leftover Halloween candy (but not as much as I have previously), and other decidedly NOT clean-eating stuff. 

Am I too tired?  Probably not.  Too lazy?  Assuredly.  But HOW do I stop?  How did you fitness and food blog girls do it…the ones of you who didn’t already love exercise?  Or are there any of you out there who didn’t love exercise?  Am I the only one?  Anyway…enough of that.

Other than the above rant, today wasn’t too bad.  I got my work done, got my revision of my paper done, and I’ll be able to do research for my other paper tomorrow and hopefully get it written before tomorrow night since it’s due Wednesday and we’re passing them around amongst ourselves to proofread each other’s stuff.  Unfortunately, the book that I’m reading right now for Ethnic Lit, Everything is Illuminated by Jonathan Safran Foer, is sucking.  Thus far, it’s disjointed and silly.  We’ll see how it shapes up.

So, that’s all I’ve got today…sorry it’s less-than-fabulous, but I didn’t want to be positive and have it be fake.  I’m pissed, and that is that.

But, I leave you with some Kins-joy…Shelli enjoying some special kitty ice cream that we got her this summer:)…